They Grow ‘Em Big In Texas

They grow ’em big in Texas, which is great if you’re Klayton Kershaw and you’re making millions for hitting 98 on the gun — effectively limiting your opposition to the lowest on base percentage in the National League.

But if you’re Amy Sue and you’re trying to fit into a size 2 bikini, it really doesn’t pay to be in the 6’7″ 295 lb gene-pool.

A career in the 16-wheeler tug or a shot at Julius Peppers’ job might be her best option, and if she doesn’t make the practice squad, at least she’ll get some numbers. Call me racist, but I’ve been told black guys love big butts.

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