Mom Always Told Me I Should Be More Outgoing

mom-told-me-i-should-be-more-outgoing fail actor ad

But it wasn’t until I saw I Love You, Man that I picked myself up by the boot-straps and took out a few subtle ads…

There’s a guy trying to do a similar thing in Hollywood who thinks he has a hot screenplay, so he painted his beater car with a bunch of crap like, “honk if you want to buy the hottest horror script on the market,” and naturally every time I see him I honk just so I can see his eyes transition from pathetically hopeful to embarrassingly disappointed at the site of me and my stupid drunk friends.

As you might expect, the car spends most of the day in a parking lot just a few paces from the Chili’s Bar & Grill where he works.

Shouldn’t You Be In School?

Jim, I Saw Your Sex Tape Online The Other Night…