Burglars Steal, Snort Cocaine, Turns Out To Be Man’s Ashes

MIAMI (Reuters) — 5 burglars snorted the cremated remains of a man and two Great Danes, believing they had stolen urns filled with illegal drugs.

The ashes of an anonymous woman’s father and two Danes were stolen from her home in central Florida on December 15th along with electronic equipment and jewelry.

Authorities had no leads until early last week when 5 teenagers were arrested for another burglary and after questioning, confessed to stealing the Florida woman’s urns.

“The suspects mistook the ashes for either cocaine or heroin. It was soon discovered that the suspects snorted some of the ashes believing they were snorting cocaine,” the police report explains.

After realizing they were snorting man and beast, the kids allegedly contemplated returning the ashes but instead opted to throw them in a nearby lake, fearing their fingerprints might be on the urn.

Police divers are attempting to recover the ashes and the teens were jailed on several charges.

Like I’ve always said, this is what happens when kids listen to Rock & Roll.